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Cheesed off…

After a lot of thought, I’ve decided that I can’t afford to enter that National Sudoku Championship that I posted about a while ago. A couple of new bills have come in and I can’t even spare the £25 entry fee, let alone the travel costs to Cheltenham.
I’m pretty gutted, especially after reading this report on last week’s World Sudoku Championshp. Without boasting, I can say that I regularly complete puzzles like that in 15 minutes or less. Not every time of course, and not in competition. But I really think I had a good chance at the national title.
Oh well, there’s always next year.

ETA: OK, I printed out the puzzle and tried it. And spent 20 minutes making an utter hash of it. But I still say: I coulda been a contender!

Feeling Better….

My health seems to be taking a slight upwards turn. My tendonitis is definately a little better – I managed to do up my seatbelt myself this morning, and I can actually raise my right hand above my head for the first time in weeks; the chronic aching seems to have diminished as well, so that I’ve had a couple of good nights’ sleep.
A remark form B the other day made me realise that I’ve felt hardly a twinge from my knees in weeks. And I’ve had only one attack of heart arrhythmia since my hospital trip a month ago. Plus Im getting fewer nighttime headaches and dehydration. The tendonitis is upposed to sort itself with time, but all the other improvements only started after I chucked the iboprufen.
Could also be connected to the passing Saturn/Neptune opposition which was bouncing off so my of my chart; and the Lunar eclipse the other day was directly on my Saturn/Sun opposition. And my Prog Moon is finally moving out of my 6th house – as we speak!
Whatever – I’m not celebrating yet. Let’s see if the improvements continue.
In the meantime, I’m getting lots of new ideas for site redesigns. I’ve started a new design of the Oakleaf Circle site (creating the new page template and CSS took no time, but transferring all the links into them is going to be a bugger); and I have a new design for Transit drawn up on paper.
So I’ll get on with it while I still feel this creative and energetic.

Violent Porn

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Well, that’s caught your eye.
The Goverment has announced plans making the possession of violent pornographic images illegal; this followed a campaign by the mother of a young woman murdered by a man was obsessed with internet images of violence and necrophilia. Besides all the good arguments against the claim that volent imagery leads to volence in real life, and the question of whether this particular killer would have murdered anyway, there are many doubts and questions about criminalising the possession of violent pornographic images – what consitutes “violent pornography”; what about mainstream Hollywood moves containing violent sexual imagery; would BDSM images be illegal, for instance. But what made me fume was a Guardian article on the subject, giving the views of a range of women campaigners. A couple of them were remarkably sensible, cautioning against more censorship. However, the inevitable hardcore feminist made her appearence.
Julie Bindel spent most of her contribution talking about a film she had seen years ago, and how awful it was. The film was Snuff, the ganddaddy of the snuff films genre and it supposedly shows the real-life killing and dismemberment of a woman. Bindel writes:

There are, of course, people who have never encountered extreme pornography, can’t really imagine what it could be like, and therefore can’t see why we need this law. Twenty-five years ago I watched a snuff movie with other anti-porn activists, journalists and special film-effects experts. One of the activists had gone into a porn shop in England and asked if the owner had something “really extreme”. He gave her a film of a woman in South America being raped, tortured and murdered. As a finale, her hand was sawn off. By that time it was only the feminists left in the room, the others having run out to cry, or be sick. We knew what we would be seeing, because we had heard about it from activists in the US who were fighting the same battles.
We had proved that snuff existed (the film experts verified that there were no camera tricks to depict the sawing), and one of the journalists wrote copiously about the issue, urging police to take action. Nothing happened.

Nothing happened because the film was a fake – as were all the other “snuff movies” that followed. In three decades of police porn seizures world-wide, no genuine “snuff movie” has ever come to light; the panic over women being brutally slain for the cameras was a typical urban legend.
It would be interesting to know just who were the “film experts” who verified that the film used no special effects. (As it happens, I used to have a copy of the Radical Feminist Network newsletter that carried a report of the film viewing that Bindel refers to. Having chucked out most of my magazine archives in a house move since, I no longer have the newsletter, but I clearly remember there was no mention of “film experts” then – only a reported claim by an unnamed police surgeon that the dismemberment scenes were real.)
OK, so Bindel is an ignorant person – does it matter? Yes it does. She presents herself not as an ordinary person with no special knowledge, but as a feminist campaigner, expert in anything concerning pornography and violence against women. That was why the Guardian asked her for a contribution to the debate – and snuff movies certainly fall within the remit of ‘pornography and violence against women’. Yet she has clearly never done any research at all into the subject.

The feminists’ reaction to Snuff wasn’t all that much different from the reaction of Christian fundamentalists to the “blasphemous” The Last Temptation of Christ a few years later. Both sets of fundamentalists were outraged for much the same reasons – having little or no exposure to mainstream films, they were unaware of the language and evolution of cinema, and ignorant of the place of the film in question in the natural progression of cinematic story-telling. And their dogma, and leaders, told them that the film was Evil and the work of Satan/Patriarchial Culture. And fundmentalists of all stripes need their Bad Guy, whatever name it takes; that way, they can be certain that they are the Good Guys….

There is no lack of information about snuff films out there. With analyses and debunkings going back to the 1980s, anybody who has done any investigation at all into violent pornographywill have come across the truth about the snuff movie legend. Some of the snuff-film makers themselves have been happy to admit to fakery; the Japanese film-makers who produced the gory Guinea Pig series were so amused by the outrage generated by the first film that they promptly brought out Guinea Pig 2: The Making of Guinea Pig 1.
There’s also at least one book on the subject: Killing For Culture which devotes a whole chapter to Snuff and explanations of its special effects (lots of pig parts, apparently).
Heck, you don’t even have to read a book – just go to the Internet Movie Database, type “Snuff” into the title search field and you’ll get all the details of the film – writers, director, actors etc. The viewers’ comments on the film are even more informative, by the way; according to them, the laughable special effects, with bright orange “blood” and organs pulled out of the wrong places, wouldn’t fool anybody. Finally, if you want to see the film for yourself, you can order the DVD from Amazon (Region 1 only, though).

In 30 minutes or so of internet searching, I’ve come up with all of the above information – and I’ve never pretended to be either an expert on pornography or a spokesperson for womankind.

Good News…

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…perhaps. A couple of weeks ago I noticed an entry form for a national Soduku competion in the back of a puzzle magazine. The closing date was the next day, but I completed the entry puzzle in 15 minutes and got it into the post.
This morning, I received a letter telling me that I was amongst the 250 people selected for entry to the national competition – first prize £1000!
The bad news is that entry costs £25 and I’ll have to travel to Cheltenham to compete. The deisel there and back will cost at least another £70 or £80. So, to be in with a chance of winning a grand and national fame, I need to find at least £100.
Hmmmm……

ETA: Just noticed that I will also be required to present some form of photo-ID. But I don’t have either a passport or a driving licence, or anything else like it. The only other time I needed photo-ID, it was purely a formality and a photocopy was all that was required. So I just borrowed a genuine driving licence and fired up Photoshop. (OK, officer, it’s a fair cop – I’ll go along quietly!)
However, this time, the real deal will be needed. So I’d better get in touch with the organisers and find out what they’ll accept.

Nightime…..

….1.00am and I’m lying awake, silently cursing the aching in my knees and shoulders that are keeping me from sleep.
Voices outide, laughter, hooting calls. John and Pauline having another party? No – they’re too considerate to let guests make such a noise outsde at this time of night. B snores on beside me.
Icautiously get out o be, grab a dressing gown, tiptoe downstairs in the dark.
Once there, I get the dressing-gown on – not an easy task these days, with my tendonitis (or adhesive capsulitis, or frozen shoulder, or whatever it’s called). I first have to drape the thing over my head like a blanket, push my arms forward into the sleeves then wriggle, shrug and pull the garment down. This takes a good minute or more; I then discover that the belt has come out of the loops. Unable to reach behind to loop the belt around me, I have to take the dressing gown off, loop the belt through, then repeat the “prisoner being taken into court” performance.
Eventually, I am decently dressed enough to go outside. The night is dark – cloudly and with the Moon hiding beneath the horizon. But there seems to be a good amount of ambient light. The summer nightime twlight is evidently not yet over and my eyes quickly switch to night vision; I begin my patrol around the houses. They’re all dark. Even Son’s lights are off. Only the blinking light atop the satellite broadband receiving mast lets me know that we aren’t having one of the usual power cuts
The laughter, having stopped for a time, suddenly bursts forth again for a few moments. It’s not coming from close, but somewhere over to the south. Impossible to tell the distance – sound travels far at night in the country. It sounds like two, three people at most.
Teenagers playing ghosthunters and scaring themselves silly around the Castle? But I can’t see any flashes of torchlight. So they must be down the road, out of sight, somewhere by the fish farm. Somebody going way from the village, then, after a party or late lock-in. Visitors, not locals. Nobody living up here, away from the village, makes that kind of noise this late (anybody who regularly did would eventually get grief from the local poacher for scaring away the deer). So, somebody staying up at one of the houses up the road, or renting the holiday let past the fishfarm,or fishermen camping by the loch.
I think all this as I walk around. Maybe, I think, I could walk along the road a bit and see who it was – they wouldn’t see me in the dark, would they? It would be fun to be invisible, slipping through the dark, a shadow….
But then, I realise. I’m wearing a white dressing gown, my skin is pale, my hair is light-coloured. To anybody with night-eyes, I’m perfectly visible. And, though I’m barefoot and trying to tread softly, the noise of the gravel underfoot echos around the houses.
There could be anybody, somebody out there, somebody who is invisible watching me. Right now.
I hurry back indoors. I sit and read a book until it’s time to take a painkiller, then back to bed….
Eventually, I sleep.

Eye Contact

I’ve suspected for a long time that I have Aspergers Syndrome (although sometimes I think I’m not Aspie at all, but just normally weird). My life-long difficulty making eye contact with people is one of the reasons for my suspicion; it’s a well-known AS trait (along with a tendency to mistake the standard “How are you?” greeting for an enquiry about the current state of my health).
Having poor eyesight gives me an easy excuse for avoidi eye contact – I used to tell people “When I was a baby, I couldn’t see faces at all, so I never learned to look at them.” But really, it makes me acutely uncomfortable to look somebody in the eyes – I usually have to be drunk to do it (then I go amusingly wall-eyed!) I’m sure it makes many people think i’m stand-offish or unfriendly, but I never know quite how to look at someody when I’m talking to them. Do I stare deeply into their eyes at all times and risk coming across as some sort of psycho? Stare over their shoulder and make them wonder what’s behind them? Take off my glasses, unfocus my eyes and gaze vaguely at that pink blob with the noises coming out of the middle of it?
So I was pleased to discover this helpful article on WrongPlanet.net, giving tips on how to make eye contact appropriately and without too much discomfort.

Something….

Been meaning to write something here for days, but somehow the urge stops when I actually sit down to do it.
Anyway, my health is both better and worse. I’ve been off the Ibuprofen for three weeks now and I’m feeling quite a lot better. I actually walked back from the village shop this morning without having to stop for breath or even go especially slowly up the hill. Mind you, I’d got a lift into the village instead of walking both ways, but I was still pleasantly surprised at my energy and stamina. I’m now wondering if the Iboprufen (which I’d been taking daily without a break for around five years) mght have been responsible for a large part of my tiredness and breathlessness.
I’m sleeping rather better too. My knees seem to have stopped aching at night, although that might be down to the warm weather; we’ll see what happens this winter.
However, the tendonitis in my shoulders has got steadily worse. I’m now having difficulty doing simple actions like dressing myself and brushing my hair, because my upper arms are just too stiff and painful to go anywhere behind me. The constant aching in my shoulders now mean that I’m losing that improvement in sleep I mentioned, and sliding back to spending two or three hours a night gazing vacantly at nighttime TV.
I’ve been booked in for more physiotherapy (even though the last lot didn’t do any good at all), and I’m swallowing as much paracetamol as is safe. Otherwise, I just have to wait – apparently, this is a self-curing condition. In most cases…..

A Week is a Long Time…..

….plenty long enough, I would have thought, for some real evidece to emerge in the foiled “Al Qaeda plot” to to blow up planes.
Sure, two guns and a suspicious suitcase have been found in High Wycombe woods. But if they had any connection with the “terrorists” who have been banged up, an announcement to that effect would have been made (my guess – some local criminals stashing their stuff outdoors.)
It’s now getting very hard to believe this isn’t all smoke and spin – as many have pointed out, the major source of the information, the “Al Qaeda operative” captured in Pakistan, originally fled Britain to avoid arrest for his uncle’s murder and will have been subjected to heavy-duty interrogation intended to force something out of him in the quickest possible time.
Craig Murray, weho used to be Our Man in Uzbekistan has a whole lot to say about this and other security scares in his blog; meanwhile The Register casts doubt on the feasibility of using TAPT to blow up anything:

Making a quantity of TAPT sufficient to bring down an airplane is not quite as simple as ducking into the toilet and mixing two harmless liquids together.
First, you’ve got to get adequately concentrated hydrogen peroxide. This is hard to come by, so a large quantity of the three per cent solution sold in pharmacies might have to be concentrated by boiling off the water. Only this is risky, and can lead to mission failure by means of burning down your makeshift lab before a single infidel has been harmed.
But let’s assume that you can obtain it in the required concentration, or cook it from a dilute solution without ruining your operation. Fine. The remaining ingredients, acetone and sulfuric acid, are far easier to obtain, and we can assume that you’ve got them on hand.
Now for the fun part
Take your hydrogen peroxide, acetone, and sulfuric acid, measure them very carefully, and put them into drinks bottles for convenient smuggling onto a plane. It’s all right to mix the peroxide and acetone in one container, so long as it remains cool. Don’t forget to bring several frozen gel-packs (preferably in a Styrofoam chiller deceptively marked “perishable foods”), a thermometer, a large beaker, a stirring rod, and a medicine dropper. You’re going to need them.
It’s best to fly first class and order Champagne. The bucket full of ice water, which the airline ought to supply, might possibly be adequate – especially if you have those cold gel-packs handy to supplement the ice, and the Styrofoam chiller handy for insulation – to get you through the cookery without starting a fire in the lavvie.
Easy does it
Once the plane is over the ocean, very discreetly bring all of your gear into the toilet. You might need to make several trips to avoid drawing attention. Once your kit is in place, put a beaker containing the peroxide / acetone mixture into the ice water bath (Champagne bucket), and start adding the acid, drop by drop, while stirring constantly. Watch the reaction temperature carefully. The mixture will heat, and if it gets too hot, you’ll end up with a weak explosive. In fact, if it gets really hot, you’ll get a premature explosion possibly sufficient to kill you, but probably no one else.
After a few hours – assuming, by some miracle, that the fumes haven’t overcome you or alerted passengers or the flight crew to your activities – you’ll have a quantity of TATP with which to carry out your mission. Now all you need to do is dry it for an hour or two.

Cell

book coverCell by Stephen King
The blurb on the back claims that King is the greatest storyteller ever. Oh no he’s not. Not on the evidence of this, anyway. I can instantly come up with the names of at least three other authors whose plotting and characterisation are consistently superior to this. (OK, the three are Robert Goddard, Dick Francis and Gerald Seymour).
King’s early stuff was brilliant – I remember sitting up all night reading The Shining – but it looks like he is getting seriously bored with cranking out a novel every year. so bored, in fact, he’s starting to recycle plots and themes.
In this book, the majority of humans are wiped out by a kind of neural virus transmitted through mobile phones – their brains are instantly “wiped” and they revert to bestiality. The hero bands together with a few other survivors and searches for his son, who may or may not have survived. These survivors have telepathic dreams that feature an evil super-villain and directs them to a place.
This echoes the plot of one of King’s earliest novels, The Stand, where most of humanity as been wiped out by a virus (a flu virus this time, and, incidentally a plot idea blatantly ripped off from a British TV series) and there is a handful of survivors banding together, experiencing telepathic dreams involving etc. etc. But at least this new book is only about a fifth of the length of The Stand. 🙂
I can see Cell being made into a movie – it’s highly visual. The hero is a graphic artist who draws comics and there are scenes where he imagines the action in terms of a graphic novel; so I think I can safely predict that this will also come out in graphic novel form eventually.
I also predict that this is the first book of a series; first, the ending is left wide open and second, there’s aso a quite large plot hole that no competant writer could leave in accidentally, and which will presumably be filled in a sequel.
There are echoes of his Dark Tower series here, though I could only get about a third of the way through the first book in that series and didn’t feel at all inclined to try any of the others. That’s because of my main complaint about King’s work – it’s just too bloody and gory. Reading though Cell, I got the impression that he was throwing in buckets of blood because his readers are expecting it, and also because it hides quite a lot of weakness in the writing. Without the gore, he would have to write far more descriptively.