I Get Mail….

…but it’s not often like this (the original, sent to my Transit editorial address, is in multi-coloured, bolded, italicised and underlined 16pt Ariel, decorated with a nice picture of autumn leaves):

——-Original Message——-

From: CANADA EDMONTON
Date: 2/3/2009 1:55:39 PM
To: DEVELOPMENT@MUSEUM.TV
Subject: Fw: E-MAIL 4 TO PILOT GUIDES ////// LONELY PLANET TV TRAVEL SHOW OF GREAT BRITTAIN

——-Original Message——-

From: CANADA EDMONTON
Date: 2/3/2009 1:24:46 PM
To: SCREENCOM@DUMGAL.GOV.UK
Subject: Fw: E-MAIL 4 TO PILOT GUIDES ////// LONELY PLANET TV TRAVEL SHOW OF GREAT BRITTAIN

From: CANADA EDMONTON
Date: 2/3/2009 1:01:12 PM
To: INFO@PILOT.CO.UK
Subject: E-MAIL 4 TO PILOT GUIDES ////// LONELY PLANET TV TRAVEL SHOW OF GREAT BRITTAIN

HELLO – HELLO TO PILOT GUIDES //// LONELY PLANET TV TRAVEL SHOW OF GREAT BRITTAIN
OR MAYBE OF USA , OR ANOTHER COUNTRY
THIS IS AN E-MAIL I DON’T KNOW WHAT NUMBER , MAYBE # 4 OR NUMBER # 5 TO YOU ALL
BUT ANYWAYS, I HAVE NOTICED THAT YOUR TV SHOW
” PILOT GUIDES TV SHOW ” WENT OFF THE WEEKDAY TV SCHEDULE ON THE CANADIAN TV CHANNEL OLN
PILOT GUIDES TV TRAVEL SHOW IS NOT BEING PLAYED EVERY NIGHT ON THE OUTDOOR LIFE NETWORK TV CHANNEL CANADA
NOT ON WEEKDAYS
I SEE THE OLN TV CANADA STATION HAS TAKEN YOU OFF
AND YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK I SENT YOU ALL AN E-MAIL A FEW MONTHS AGO , AND I WAS MENTIONING THE POOR QUALITY PROGRAMS AND HOW POORLY THE TV SHOW HAD BECOME
HOW YOU ALL BEEN SHOWING YOUR OWN VERSIONS OF LIFE ON PLANET EARTH
HOW SHARKS LIVE IN THE LAKES, AND HOW PENGUINS LIVE IN HAWAIAN WATERS
SOMETHING LIKE THAT
YOU BEEN FILMING JUST SOMETHING NOT REAL
FICTION
THE PILOT GUIDES TV SHOW ALL EPISODES BECAME IRRITATTING , BORING AND STUPID
AND I KNEW SOMETHING LIKE THAT WAS COMING
AND I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THAT MATES !
I KNOW YOU ALL WANT TO PLAY GAMES AND HAVE FUN, BUT YOUR GAMES ARE JUST STUPID
NOT FUN AND YOU’RE ALL SERIOUS ABOUT IT
SO I GO AND I GIVE YOU A TOOL LIKE CAMERAS AND FUNDS TO TRAVEL , AND YOU DO WHAT ?
YOU DISRESPECT ME
YOU INSULT ME , AND THEN YOU WANT TO JUST KICK ME MORE DOWN
KICK ‘EM WHEN THEY’RE DOWN
NICE PSYCHOLOGY
I AM VERY HAPPY THAT YOU ARE OFF TV ON WEEKDAYS
I SEE THAT ON WEEKENDS YOUS STILL SHOW AN ODD EPISODE HERE AND THERE
I DON’T WATCH IT
AND YOU DIDN’T DO NOTHING ACTUALLY
YOU DID INSULT ME BY SAYING THAT LIFE IS BORING AND FUNNY , BUT WHAT YOU BEEN FILMING WAS NEVER REAL
IT’S LIKE ME GIVING A LOADED GUN TO A PERSON THAT I KNOW FOR SURE WILL TURN AROUND AND TRY TO SHOOT ME IN THE BACK
WE HAVE TO GIVE YOUS BLIND BULLETS
ALL I WAS ASKING WAS JUST FOR THE REAL SHOWS
AND YOU CAN’T EVEN DO THAT
THAT ” POWER ” OF YOURS MUST REALLY BE FUN FOR YOU, YOU LIKE TO BE MAGICIANS
EH !
GOOD THING I DON’T GIVE YOU REAL POWER OF LIFE
YOU’D SET ME UP GOOD THEN, WOULDN’T YA
FORGET THE DONATION
YES, I WAS THE ONE WHO ASKED YOU ALL IF YOU WOULD DONATE SOME MONEY
I’M UNEMPLOYED
I HAVE NO MONEY
AND CANADA IS A COUNTRY OF NO EDUCATION
LACKS EVERY INTEREST IN LIFE
AND THINKS NOTHING IS WRONG
THEY WANT TO KEEP GOING CROOKED SICK AND BROKE
AND I WANT TO ENJOY LIFE BECAUSE I CREATED IT ALL
LIFE IS A MAGICAL EXPERIENCE
FULL OF MAGIC
WONDERS
FULL OF ENERGY A MAGNETIC ENERGY
FULL OF LIFE
HEALTH
AND KNOWLEDGE
AND YOU ALL , NOT JUST GREAT BRITTAIN, IT’S GERMANY, POLAND, AMERICA USA , CANADA
YOU ALL JUST WANT TO BITE AND BITE AND BITE
AND IF ADOLF HITLER WAS AROUND, HE’D GET RID OF THIS
MAYBE OR MAYBE NOT
WHO KNOWS
BUT I SURE DON’T LIKE IT
YOU’RE NOT PEOPLE ANYMORE
YOU’RE SOME KIND OF A ORGANISM THAT WON’T STOP GIVING OUT NEGATIVE VIBES
AND I DON’T KNOW WHY YOU’RE STILL AROUND
IT IS GOING SO SLOW , THAT IT IS TAKING VERY LONG
I AM A LITTLE SAD ABOUT IT, THAT THIS THING IS STILL HAPENNING
BUT I WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW MY COMMENTS
YOU DID IT TO YOUR SELFS
I DIDN’T DO IT
I WENT TO MY TV SET AND I WANTED TO WATCH, SO YOU PEOPLE JUST TURNED THINGS AROUND
MAKING ME TO AN IDIOT
LIKE I CAN’T TELL WHAT IS GOING ON
I WOULDN’T GIVE YOU FIAT CAR IF YOU PAID ME A MILLION DOLLARS
TAKE YOUR JAGAURAS AND YOUR TANKS ROLLS-ROYCES AND DRIVE THOSE
FIAT AUTO IS BECOMING THE WORLD’S # 1 AUTO MANUFACTURER
I’VE HAD IT WITH THE MERCEDES-BENZES AND BMWS AND VWS , FORGET IT,
IT’S FIAT AUTO AND IT’S MY FINAL WORD
GIOOD LUCK TO YOU ALL
TAKE CARE
KEEP YOUR MONEY
YOU GONNA NEED IT
I SAY THERE WILL BE A WORLD WAR III COMING TO EUROPE AND SHORTLY
WAR OF LIFE
THE END
GOOD BYE
REPLY IS NOT NEEDED
YE
I HAD A HEADACHE IN MY LEFT TEMPLE , THAT WAS ABOUT IT

END OF MESSAGE
FEBRUARY 3 RD 2009
FROM::::::EDMONTON:::::ALBERTA::::::CANADA::::
::::::::NORTH-AMERICA:::::::

No, I have no idea whatsoever….